It’s been over a month. I still don’t have much that I feel I can say. On the outside I am moving on with life and keeping it together. Inside I’m still falling down a rabbit hole of emotions.
Sorting through Jackie’s things has been both therapeutic and heart breaking. Some days, it feels like closure, and other days I feel that if I keep enough of her belongings around me she will magically appear again, arms open and full of wisdom. I’d give anything to argue with her again about overstaying her welcome in the ‘opinions on Kristen’s life choices’ department. I’d love for some of her advice now. Give me a little direction. Comfort. I am so thankful I got to share these twenty-four years of this life with her and I am thankful I can confidently say I will see her in the next.
Though not the loss of a grandmother, I am also still dealing with this recent break up. After all was said and done I am sure that we were not meant to be but at the same time it is hard losing so much of my support system all at once. I feel a little broken, though I know I’ll heal. Luckily, I serve a God that specializes in the healing of the broken. It’s kind of His thing. He’s got a plan for me and He pays attention to details.
After Jackie passed away, Brad’s sister sent me the sweetest card accompanied by an adorably wrapped box. Inside was a beautiful Compass charm. Not even a week later, my ladies’ Bible group began the study Jonah: Navigating a Life Interrupted. Take a guess at what the main image throughout the study was. You got it. A compass. A compass that looked very similar to my charm. God knows just how to get my attention. (Shiny Things!) 🙂
Just as I suspected, this study was exactly what I needed, just when I needed it. I may not understand these ‘Life Interruptions’ I’m having to go through, but if I focus my eyes on God and cast my cares upon Him, the waves in this storm don’t seem so big. My life interruptions become Divine Interventions, and I can more clearly see that He can use these events in my life to make me more like Him, and to glorify Him. Don’t get me wrong, these events still hurt. It still sucks – every bit of it. But this isn’t the end, and with the right perspective, it is all okay. I think that is called a peace that passes all understanding.
Every now and then we have to navigate our brokenness. But we don’t have to do it alone. God’s strength is displayed best in our weaknesses. Look up to Him and let Him use these ‘interruptions’ in your life to form your testimony. “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” (James4:8a) Trust Him. He is in control. Thank goodness – He is in control.
What divine intervention has God brought you through? Are you going through one now? How has He turned your life interruption into a testimony? What’s your story?
“You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule. You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you. You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.” (Matt.5:3-5 Beatitudes 1-3, The Message)