I believe it was somewhere between dinner and more corn dip that I heard it. No. Definitely couldn’t be. Is this real life? … Yep. There it was. A full conversation about pregnancy, childbirth and the gruesome effects that come along with it. On my care-free girls’ trip.
I knew it was happening. It had been happening all around me over the course of many years. Denial can be a wonderful thing. I should have known when I titled a group text ‘Best Friend Baby Babble.’ Sometimes I would just throw in a picture of my cat to mix it up from all the teething and onesie pictures.
But with that conversation, half a mile a way from a beach and a live music bar that we were not at, I truly realized that my friends were growing up without me.
This definition of growing up involves meeting a guy, falling in love, engagement, wedding, marriage, pregnancy, baby, talk of more babies… First it was Maggie, then Becca, Jamie… Even the ladies in my Bible study. All married, mothers, or in relationships.
There are times when I feel all the feels. Times when I want to cuddle. Someone to call and talk to on the phone for hours about opinions and problems and life’s little lessons. Times when kitty purrs just don’t seem to make everything better and pizza only makes me fat.
But once I ride out the hormones I realize that I can’t imagine being there now. I love my friends and their babies SO much, but the more I’m around it the more I realize how much I am not ready for that right now. I bask in the glory that is having to only answer for myself. I spend my money and my time however I see fit. If I want to go to Macon this afternoon and hit up a concert at the Cox I can just get in my car and go. When I want to bleach the crap out of my hair for a change I just do it. If I want to save my little income and go to Europe I don’t have to ask anyone else’s permission to do so. (Besides work 😜)
I am so thankful for this freedom. And I’m thankful for all of my friends: the married mommies, the single ladies, and my guy friends too. They’re seriously all the best.
All my ‘grown up’ friends love living vicariously through my awkward situations and adventures. They share wisdom they’ve learned from their own trials and errors in life. I am genuinely happy for every milestone and moment they have. Their kids make my heart happy. Even their husbands have become protective of me like big brothers. I can’t imagine doing life without them.
And then my single, child-less friends, oh how I love them so. Solidarity never looked so good. Ready at the drop of a hat for concerts, costumes, river floats, grilling, binge-watching tv, rocking out to Taylor Swift, hanging out on rooftops or with celebrities’ relatives at sushi bars, and just having random heart to hearts about everything under the sun.
This season of my life is so full of blessings and wonderful people. God has still got a lot to teach me before I’m ready to fully grow up. I think I’ll stay in Neverland just a little longer. And that’s just fine with me.