This is where I’m coming from: Let me just start out by saying that God really knows what He is doing. That sounds pretty obvious, but it is so easy to get wrapped up in my own plans and pinterest boards that I forget that He’s got this. He’s got me. And that His plans are exceedingly and abundantly better than I can imagine.
Earlier this year I was trying to figure out what my next steps would look like. With the website company being sold, a large work load was lifted from my shoulders and I knew something else was coming my way. A friend and I had contemplated packing up and moving away. We had googled apartments and jobs. I’d priced tiny homes and motor homes. I had left loft life and had a lot of ideas flowing through my head.
I’ve never been a person with a 5-year plan. And I’ve noticed that freaks a lot of people out. You can’t put on a resume that your overall goal in life is to have a small home, raise kids to love Jesus, grow a huge vegetable garden, and play an active role in your community. That doesn’t involve steps, degrees, or careers – just a house, husband, and plot of land that I haven’t yet obtained.
In the midst of all of this planning, I was trying to figure out where God wanted me. I knew that where ever He wanted me was where I needed to be. If a job opening fell in my lap, I hoped God had placed it there and applied. A church needed a website designer? That must be God, right? Application sent in! All the while I’m praying for these opportunities but over-all trying to pray for His Will. I prayed that He would open the doors He wanted opened and close all the others. No guessing room!
I know that sounds peaceful and faith-y, but let me tell you: having doors shut on you is no joke. It hurts. Knocks you back a bit. Makes you rethink things. Learn a little more about yourself. Meanwhile my friend had to back out of our plans and shared pinterest boards. Sometimes life happens. And as I said earlier, though it really sucked at the time, God knew exactly what He was doing. But I didn’t.
I just wanted to know what I was supposed to be doing. I wanted to delight in the Lord. Be in His will. God gives us gifts and talents and interests for a reason. Where in life could I look and see God at work most? To my surprise it was in the tiny town that I had been dreaming of escaping. While I was so busy planning and pinning, God had surrounded me with a community of ladies passionate for Him as well as people passionate about our community. When reflecting on things that brought me the most joy, I discovered that family, my ladies’ Bible group, and Pulaski Tomorrow were at the top of the list.
As this became more and more apparent, the anxiety of not getting the out-of-town opportunities turned into praises because I began to feel God calling me into a stillness. Multiple local opportunities began opening up, to the point that I felt God was just messing with me. It was like, “Okay God,,, I get it. Staying put!” I kind of moved back home and applied for a few of the positions that opened up. I was intentionally not getting my hopes set on anything other than God’s will at this point . That’s when the ladies at the Arts Council called for an interview.
I can honestly say that I am very happy and at peace, even though this wasn’t my abstract vision for where I was supposed to be right now. I can in no way argue that God placed me here. That He blessed me here. And that I am surrounded by love and support.
I have such a wonderful family. I am overwhelmed by the love and community God gave me in the family of believers He placed me in. And did I mention I got a new job? Oh yeah. As of August, meet the new Office Manager for the Hawkinsville Opera House. At your service.
But I’ll tell you a little more on that later! 😉